If you ever wondered how to judge the success of a rabbi, you know how complex the matter can be. What are the criteria, the measuring rods, by which a rabbi is judged?

But fret no longer. Newsweek magazine on April 2 solved the problem by publishing its annual list of “America’s top 50 rabbis.” The yardstick used is not clear. Was it Torah learning? Apparently that was not a factor, since among the jurors there seems to be no one who could measure Torah learning. Was it the ability to uplift and inspire a community to return to Torah learning and living? That, too, was evidently not an issue, since among the jurors there was no one who could appreciate that quality. The magazine’s press release does mention “impact” as a criterion, but it is not clear how “impact” was weighed. Was it the size of the rabbi’s institution, or the amount of publicity he received? Or was it the rabbi’s popularity, which was gained by never taking a stand on anything not previously approved by the New York Times editorial pages? Rabbinic popularity, after all, is not difficult to attain: never push congregants to live more Jewish lives, to perform more mitzvos, to refrain from gossip or desecration of the Name of G-d, to devote more time to Torah study, to give more generously to tzedakah.

One wonders who chose the choosers. There were no rabbis on the committee, no Judaic scholars, no religious academicians. Instead, they were captains of industry — top executives of Time-Warner, Sony, and CBS. Their only qualification to be judges of rabbis is that they all seem to be Jews. (In which they are very traditional, for is it not an old Jewish article of faith that every Jew, no matter how unlettered, is a rabbinic mayven?)

It is not even certain if any one of the judges is personally an observant Jew, or is conversant with any basic Jewish text. How very strange: those who choose prizes for literature are themselves writers; prizes in physics are awarded by other physicists. It is quite correctly presumed that only those who are themselves experts in the field can measure the qualifications of their peers. By what standards are the Newsweek jurors connoisseurs in what constitutes a good rabbi, much less a “top” rabbi? On this, Newsweek has no comment.

How does one evaluate the success of a rabbi? Much of what a genuine, dedicated rabbi does is so far beneath the radar, so unseen, as to defy categorization. The pasuk in Malachi 2:7, which refers to the teaching role of the ancient Kohein, is often the model for the ideal rav: “Ki sifsei Kohein yishmeru daas, v’Torah yevakshu mipihu, ki malach Hashem Tzevakos hu — For the Kohein’s lips should keep knowledge, and they should seek Torah from his mouth, for he is the messenger of the L-rd of Hosts.” It is rather unlikely that Newsweek used this verse as their yardstick, but what the prophet Malachi is saying here is that the ideal rav is a messenger from G-d Himself, has deep knowledge of G-d’s laws, and inspires his followers to preserve His Torah. He is, in a word, a genuine “rabbi,” which of course means “teacher.”

One of the most effective and successful rabbis I know is a living embodiment of this verse. He serves in a remote town with a small synagogue and tiny membership, but he devotes his entire life to his flock. He teaches how to read Hebrew, how to study Chumash, how to practice mitzvos, how to daven, how best to serve G-d. He uplifts them, raises their sights to realize what it means to be a believing, learning, and practicing Jew. He is not well-known, no one outside of his town has ever heard of him, but his personal example — and that of his wife —is on such a high level that they are a living sanctification of G-d’ s Name, and have brought countless people back to the joys of Torah life. I suspect that in the eyes of his Creator he is a very successful rabbi. But surprise, surprise! He failed to make Newsweek’s top 50.

The criteria by which Newsweek’s rabbis were selected are so nebulous and so without substance, and the jurors so pathetically unqualified, that to be chosen for their list comes close to being an embarrassment, while not to be chosen is the real honor. The more I think about it, the more am I grateful to be so deeply honored.