Join The Conversation With Mishpacha's Weekly Newsletter

SisterSchmooze...because three heads are better than one

Some people never look back. But the frum Jew is constantly reevaluating, self-assessing, applying 20/20 hindsight. It’s part of our mindset to always wonder: Did I do the right thing? If I had a chance at a do-over, would I do things differently?

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Miriam Regrets… It’s Elul again. Time to confront some basic premises that I (and you?) tend to ignore most of the year. Everything that lives is going to die. No exceptions. (That includes me.) There is judgment, and there is a Judge. Everyone will have to answer before the Judge. (That includes me.) Keeping those admittedly scary premises in mind, Elul is a good time for me to think about my “bucket list.” A few years ago, that term became a part of popular American culture. Taking its cue from the slang term for death, “to kick the bucket” (don’t even ask where that comes from — too macabre for these pages…), a “bucket list” was a list composed by two fictional, terminally ill men of places they wanted to see and things they wanted to do before they died. It was, to my mind, a very stupid list.           It included places to go, things to eat, thrills to experience. There was the obligatory relationship stuff thrown in, but mostly it was about doing more temporary things in this temporary world they were about to leave permanently. It had little or nothing on it about saying I’m sorry. About correcting mistakes and making up for bad choices. Nothing on it about regrets.

To read the rest of this story, please buy this issue of Mishpacha or sign up for a weekly subscription

Share this page with a friend. Fill in the information below, and we'll email your friend a link to this page on your behalf.

Your name
Your email address
You friend's name
Your friend's email address
Please type the characters you see in the image into the box provided.

Drink to Eternity
Rabbi Moshe Grylak Redemption doesn’t simply mean being let out of jail
Klal Yisrael Is Always Free
Yonoson Rosenblum "In that merit will Klal Yisrael continue to exist”
Home Free
Eytan Kobre My baseline for comparison is admittedly weak
Believe in Your Own Seder
Rabbi Judah Mischel Hashem is satisfied when we do our best
Picture Perfect
Yisroel Besser Take a picture — and this time, send it to yourself
Flying Solo
Rabbi Ron Yitzchok Eisenman As Pesach loomed closer, his resentment was growing
Hanging on by a Hair
Jacob L. Freedman MD “Do you still think that I’m not completely crazy?”
A Song for Every Season
Riki Goldstein Influencers map out their personal musical soundtracks
Subliminal Speech
Faigy Peritzman The deeper the recognition, the deeper the effect
The Big Change
Sarah Chana Radcliffe Spelling things out clears clouds of resentment
The Count-Up
Mrs. Shani Mendlowitz Tap the middos of Sefirah to recreate yourself
The Baker: Part 1
D. Himy, M.S. CCC-SLP with Zivia Reischer "She can't get married if she can't build a relationship...
Know This: Infertility
As Told to Bracha Stein There was no place for me. I didn’t belong
Dear Shadchan
The Girl Here's the thing: I need time