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Tishah B’Av Tears

Mishpacha Contributers

The tears of Tishah B’Av contain every pain. They can also contain the seeds of our redemption

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

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It’s the agony of crackling flames consuming the building that gave us access to Heaven

It’s the terror of mothers hearing the screams of bloodthirsty mobs coming ever closer

It’s the last breath of six million lives snuffed out, a third of our Nation decimated


It’s a tiny life, vanished before it emerged

It’s a devoted husband cut down in his prime

It’s estranged children and ill parents, disconnection and dispassion


The tears of Tishah B’Av contain every pain

They can also contain the seeds of our redemption

A series of three stories for the worst of days


Story One (below) │ Story Two Story Three



Tehila Sothner

Mindy and Caren were chatting in the hallway by the office exit. I’d have to walk past them to leave. As I approached, both of them greeted me.

“So how’s married life treating you?” Mindy asked.

I gave a bright smile. “Great, thanks.”

“Awesome!” Caren was the more boisterous of the pair. “Glad to hear it! Just wait, things will get a lot busier for you. Before you know it, you’ll be having babies!”

“Everything changes then. Enjoy the honeymoon phase while it lasts,” Mindy said. I knew she had several kids of her own. “How long have you been married, now?”

“Three months,” I said.

“Wow, three months!” Mindy exclaimed. “Time sure flies. You had such a beautiful wedding.”

“Hey, Mindy,” Caren said, “I bet you she’ll have a baby before the end of the first year.”

“Yeah, maybe she’s pregnant now — she totally wouldn’t tell us if she was, so who knows?”

I smiled at them. I was silent. But inside was a small, still voice, screaming, screaming.


This is what I would have said to them, if embarrassment — shyness — cultural norms — politeness — or something —didn’t hold back my words.

You never know what someone else is going through, so don’t make assumptions.

I’m not upset at you, I’m not hurt by your words, I know you mean no harm, but you touch on a sore spot in my heart and I cannot cry here, not now.

Yes, I’m pregnant.

But in three days I will not be pregnant any longer.

My baby is dead.

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