Join The Conversation With Mishpacha's Weekly Newsletter

Lifetakes: From House to Home

Faigy Markowitz

When you buy a house, you purchase the place that will become a home. A headache arises from a place deep within, loaded with so many what-ifs

Wednesday, November 30, 2016

 Mishpacha image


C asual house shopping can be fun for some. Visiting open houses, dreaming of possibilities, working up the courage to take the leap. But intensive house shopping can be exhausting. Combing through Zillow, comparing square footage, the condition of the house, location. More than the four walls is the home that will encompass this abode. Would our family enjoy an open layout or a more formal dining room? Will the kids benefit from a huge, flat property with cavorting green grass inviting all to play? Or is it better to give up the lawn for a smaller place that offers neighbors galore, and so many children that my kids can befriend? Do we want a swimming pool, or will it just be a magnet for unwelcome guests?

The intensity of the search. The magnitude of the decision. The threshold that, when crossed, will lead to so many unknown doors.

Old carpet can be ripped out, but the structure of a house cannot be changed. A family can move from one place to the next, but the ethereal qualities that make each family unique will never change. Choosing a place to put down roots is so much greater than shopping for this season’s wardrobe.

When you buy a house, you purchase the place that will become a home. A headache arises from a place deep within, loaded with so many what-ifs. What if the neighbors aren’t as nice as the realty agent says they are? What if there are real structural issues that the home inspector didn’t detect? What if we think our sons need the outlet of volleyball and basketball, but no sports will help fill in the fine-grain deficits in their social skills? What if my young daughter is really a social butterfly who will emerge from her cocoon and then be stuck for so many winter months without a playmate, a friend to share her imaginary world and learn the girly vocabulary words that only peers can provide?

By now I cannot even think if the furniture will fit or if the house on a quieter street is actually worth the extra $30,000. I escape to the comfort of my son’s cozy blanket as I lie next to him and help him go to sleep. I try to calm the thoughts that float through my vision.

Related Stories

Making It Work

Barbara Bensoussan

Car pool, shopping, housework, cooking, work, children, husband, family… How do successful frum wome...

At the Doorway to Adulthood

Michal Eisikowitz

For some students, the pivotal seminary year is their best opportunity to work through issues and re...

Instant Motherhood

As told to Riki Goldstein by Chana Rosenblatt

Many people thought that we had both lost our minds: how could I marry someone 16 years older than m...

Share this page with a friend. Fill in the information below, and we'll email your friend a link to this page on your behalf.

Your name
Your email address
You friend's name
Your friend's email address
Please type the characters you see in the image into the box provided.

No Misunderstandings
Rabbi Moshe Grylak Hashem revealed the secret of a balanced life
What Was the Court’s Rush?
Yonoson Rosenblum The Democratic Party’s descent into madness
Survey? Oy Vey
Eytan Kobre How could YAFFED promote such a farce?
Filling the Void
Rabbi Henoch Plotnik Jewish leaders don’t need to be declared or coronated
Top 5 Ways We Remember Our Rebbeim (and we love them for it!)
Rabbi Dovid Bashevkin An ode to these pivotal people in my life
Hanging On in Newark
Rabbi Nosson Scherman Rabbi Nosson Scherman remembers the shul of his youth
A Fine Kettle of Fish
Rabbi Ron Yitzchok Eisenman The “minor” chasadim are often the most meaningful
The Next Hill
Jacob L. Freedman The look on Malachi’s face nearly broke my heart
Tradition and Modern Meet in One Long Dance
Riki Goldstein Fusing tradition and modernity comes naturally to him
A Playlist for Shabbos
Riki Goldstein What does Moshy Kraus sing at the Shabbos table?
With Flying Colors
Riki Goldstein My 15 seconds of fame on the Carnegie Hall stage
Full Faith
Faigy Peritzman With emunah, everyone’s obligation is the same
Sarah Chana Radcliffe Silence isn’t always golden
The Only One
With Rav Moshe Wolfson, written by Baila Vorhand Within every Jew is the flame of instinctive emunah