Join The Conversation With Mishpacha's Weekly Newsletter



Fiction: Chanukah Clash

Roizy Baum

It was a risky undertaking, that’s for sure. My school friends thought I was off the wall and they made sure I knew it

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

 Mishpacha image

 

S ome people are vaguely familiar with Murphy’s Law. Murphy’s Law? Hmm. Rings a bell. Maybe something we learned in the lower elementary grades when we went through adages.… Why should they be familiar with an epigram that doesn’t apply to them? They’re from the people who drop their peanut butter sandwiches right-side up, or rather, don’t drop them at all.

They’re from the people who never have their grocery bags tear, especially not when they’re balancing two handfuls of groceries, and it’s the bag that embraces a container of cherry tomatoes that tears and the container unfastens and before you know it there are tomatoes scurrying in all directions: some beneath driving cars and others under stomping feet, squirting a seed straight into your eye, and when you bend down to retrieve the tomatoes, the watermelon you’re carrying in the other hand slips to the floor and cracks. No, they’re not from this planet of people. But ask me about Murphy’s Law and I’ll answer you loud, boisterously, and confidently: Murphy’s Law is if anything can go wrong, it will!

The Swiffer was swishing with intensity over the smear of peanut butter (from a sandwich that fell right-side down of course, and I was in a rush to clean the mess before Mom came home) while the phone was cradled between my ears and shoulder, as Faigy, the closest cousin my age from the Rosner side of the family, was filling me in on her Chanukah plans. “My family is thinking of coming to America for Chanukah and we’re considering spending a few days in New York with you!” she was saying.

“You’re staying by me! Are you?” I was saying rather than questioning. I knew I had full permission to invite Faigy to sleep at our house. She’s from Vienna and is like my sister on her New York trips.

“Yeah, that’s part of the plan. Hold your horses. I’m getting to that!”

Our relatives know that they’re invited to us anytime, all the time. And they know we mean it wholeheartedly. Every extended member of our family has already received multiple invitations, and to our great pride and joy, there were several who accepted in the past. Our home is large enough to accommodate lots of guests. My parents and I (yup, that’s our family. For now. But I still haven’t given up on filling up all the bedrooms in the house with siblings of my own) have a shared love for guests, and as we have many relatives overseas from both sides of the family, opportunity keeps knocking on our door.

“Faigy!” I said, barely containing my exhilaration, “I’m on a high!”

“You’re sure it works for you?” she asked as a measure of etiquette, not as an inquiry, knowing quite well that she’s very welcome. “I’ll let you know when my parents confirm the tickets. Talk to you later.”

I put down the phone in the greatest of spirits, though realizing that it would be a long wait until her arrival. I was conjuring up images of endless DMCs on the sofa in my bedroom, deep into the night, clutching bags of jelly worms and penguin jellies (our favorite). Ahhh. I could barely wait. (Excerpted from Teen Pages, Issue 689)

Related Stories

Hit the Lights!

Devorah Hirsch

After he tried it himself, he sat back and said, ‘That’s my item!’ He and Marvin inked a deal within...

Teen Fiction: Dumpin’ Doughnuts

Malky Cope

Dassy + doughnuts = no moderation. Once I started, there’d be no stopping. So, there was only one wa...

Health Myths, Busted

Ahuvah Sofer

Which facts about dieting are credible? Which ones are borderline myths? And which are downright non...

Share this page with a friend. Fill in the information below, and we'll email your friend a link to this page on your behalf.

Your name
Your email address
You friend's name
Your friend's email address
Please type the characters you see in the image into the box provided.
CAPTCHA
Message


 
Drink to Eternity
Rabbi Moshe Grylak Redemption doesn’t simply mean being let out of jail
Klal Yisrael Is Always Free
Yonoson Rosenblum "In that merit will Klal Yisrael continue to exist”
Home Free
Eytan Kobre My baseline for comparison is admittedly weak
Believe in Your Own Seder
Rabbi Judah Mischel Hashem is satisfied when we do our best
Picture Perfect
Yisroel Besser Take a picture — and this time, send it to yourself
Flying Solo
Rabbi Ron Yitzchok Eisenman As Pesach loomed closer, his resentment was growing
Hanging on by a Hair
Jacob L. Freedman MD “Do you still think that I’m not completely crazy?”
A Song for Every Season
Riki Goldstein Influencers map out their personal musical soundtracks
Subliminal Speech
Faigy Peritzman The deeper the recognition, the deeper the effect
The Big Change
Sarah Chana Radcliffe Spelling things out clears clouds of resentment
The Count-Up
Mrs. Shani Mendlowitz Tap the middos of Sefirah to recreate yourself
The Baker: Part 1
D. Himy, M.S. CCC-SLP with Zivia Reischer "She can't get married if she can't build a relationship...
Know This: Infertility
As Told to Bracha Stein There was no place for me. I didn’t belong
Dear Shadchan
The Girl Here's the thing: I need time